How important is fitting in with your workplace culture? Its vital. If you do not, then you usually lose your job. And, if someone is not fitting in, should the employer do something? If the odd person is causing problems that prevent the group from working effectively, usually they get rid of that odd person.

An article on CNN, Good job, lousy coworkers, does not address these questions, but rather shows how employees just did not fit one place but fit somewhere else. The incidents were:

1. Colleagues did not want to have lunch with the person or do any outside activities with the person.

2. The employee in question did not participate in extracurricular activities.

3. An employee was older with a family in a company with mostly 20-something singles; and left for the evening to be with his family. The young people centered their life around the company and resentment built up.

4. One employee was very young compared to his coworkers and felt awkward and out of place.

5. A new manager jumped into a situation with everyone creating drama that was counterproductive.

6. The last person could not spout any new ideas as they were all shot down; everyone resisted change.

Given that I do not know the particulars of each situation and in each situation the employee moved on to bigger and better things. However, one thing stuck out. Each one of these situations is common in most companies, and the successful people learn how to leverage the situation, manipulate the people, or move on quickly.

In most of the situations outlined clearly the other parties were being jerks, fearful, resentful or just stupid. In ALL the situations, the employee could have done something about it. Here is my take on each one. You can read about them here: http://money.cnn.com/galleries/2010/news/1002/gallery.workplace_culture/index.html

1. Your colleagues are not your friends and buddies no matter how much they act like that to each other. They do not want to play with you? Invite them to lunch with you and make friends towards them, and do not expect them to initiate. You are probably the outsider. If they still do not want to be friends, then remember, they are colleagues and you are a professional.

2. Participate in extracurricular activities. A big part of getting things done in a company is to have people respect you, not fear you, and be comfortable working with you. This is best done in non-work environments.

3. The young people liked to play video games during their lunches. Join them sometimes. You have a family and they do not; but that does not mean you cannot try to make friends with them in off hours.

4. When you are very young compared to everyone else, keep quiet and listen. Learn. Find a mentor. Figure out how to be helpful. Support and give to others.

5. As a new manager, you are a leader. You do not fraternize yourself with everyones drama. When you realize this is a problem you set the tone right away that people need to get along and focus on the job. If it starts to interfere you need to address it one-on-one. The worst offenders, if it is interfering with work, are fired or transferred if possible.

6. People resist change out of fear for losing their jobs, having to work more for less, or just having to face the possibility of failure. Find out what they want to do to be successful and address that. What are their goals for the year and how can your ideas help them?

In general, here are the rules:

1. Keep your mouth shut. If you really do not like it there, then quietly look elsewhere.

2. Find something early on that you can do that can contribute to the company.

3. Offer friendship, assistance, and smiles. Do not demand it or require it comes to you first.

4. Figure out the culture and do your best to adapt to it and use it to your advantage.

5. Colleagues are colleagues and remain professional at all times. You can become friends, but remember, they are your colleagues.

6. If you are in a role that people work for you, act like a leader and not a manager. If you do not know the difference then learn.